What am I drinking?

In honor of not going to the beer bloggers conference in Boulder, I thought I’d take a stab at something that on some level approximates beer blogging.

(Note: I seriously considered attending the beer bloggers conference. What sounds better than spending a weekend with people who like things including but not limited to drinking beer and talking and/or blogging about drinking beer, while also drinking beer? Not much, right? It wouldn’t even be too expensive, because Boulder is nearby so I wouldn’t have to stay at the hotel. I got all excited about this idea until I realized a few things. I have a baby. There might be a way to manage a weekend away from the baby, but that would mean Ben would be entitled to a weekend away from the baby, too, and the thought of that happening might drive me crazy, not because the thought of spending a weekend with just the baby is terrible or anything, but because holy crap, that’s a lot to do and I’m nothing if not lazy and attention-deficit disordered, so that’s not high on the list of things I’m all yay rah rah about doing. It would be great to save money by not staying at the hotel, but that adds another layer of complexity to the situation, because presumably I’d be drinking beer and talking about drinking beer on the internet, which, in addition to boring the hell out of you guys would render me incapable of driving home from Boulder, which means that Ben and Soren would have to drive me to the beer bloggers conference each day, then probably hang around Boulder all day (which, ew, no offense, Boulder, but ew!) because it would be silly to drive home and then drive back and I’m not really willing to ask my significant other and child to spend two and a half days in Boulder. Nice sentence! Finally, in addition to having a baby, I don’t get out much these days so I’m not sure I really want to inflict myself on a bunch of nice, unassuming beer bloggers who are probably all blah blah beer yay and I’d be all BLAH BLAH BLAH BEER BEER BEER YAY BEER WOOOOOHOOOO BEER BLAH BLAH inadvertent baby poop reference BLAH BLAH BEER BEEEEEEER OMG BEER YOU GUYS BEEEEEEEER WOOOOOHOOOOOOO!!!! Let’s face it. Nobody should have to deal with that.)

So I decided that I was going to tell you about what I’m drinking tonight, but that was like two hours ago, after we got back from taking Soren and Peaches (the new Rottweiler) on a walk to and around Curtis Park (I’m 6 days away from becoming the Mayor of Curtis Park, which I suppose is kind of bad ass but I’m not sure whether that requires going to Curtis Park multiple times within the next 6 days, which, to be honest, is unlikely) and before I started drinking what I’m drinking tonight. The result of drinking what I’m drinking tonight now is this post, and for that, I’m sorry.

What I’m drinking tonight is Modus Hoperandi by Ska Brewing Company. I want to tell you about this beer but the problem is I’m not actually a beer blogger so I’m not sure how to do it. I can tell you that this is a kick-fucking-ass, super-hoppy IPA. (I am a huge fan of IPA; 98% of the beer I drink is IPA.) It’s more straight-ahead hoppy than anything else and not too floral. Do you know what I mean by floral? I’d describe Mojo, for example, as a more floral IPA. Anyway, Modus Hoperandi is fucking awesome. And it comes in cans. Here’s how Ska describes it, because I’m sure they’re better at this sort of thing than I am:

It’s old man bitter. A mix of citrus and pine that will remind you of the time you went on a vision quest with your Native American cousin and woke up in a pine-grove full of grapefruit trees. An American-style India pale ale with a deep golden-orange color. Bitter and hoppy, with a surprisingly smooth finish.

me and Ben

Sandbeach Lake with an orange (old picture)

I like this description once I get past the fact that I see “vision quest” and think of someone who goes to Burning Man and I want to punch in the face, because it kind of makes sense. It’s like going hiking and ending up at Sandbeach Lake in Rocky Mountain National Park, which, for reference, is the most amazingly beautiful place I’ve ever seen in my life, but by the time we got there and were appreciating the beauty of this lake with, as you might have guessed, a sandy beach, in the middle of a forest in the middle of the mountains, we were out of water and all we had was an orange to eat. After that, we went to Oskar Blues (makers of the best beer in the universe) and had like 12 pitchers of water and some Gordon.

I’ll be honest and admit that I must not be the most sophisticated beer drinker, but I didn’t really catch the whole pine/citrus thing until I read that just now. I notice hops and bitter, which I love. In any event, this is good shit.

Good thing I didn’t go to the conference. Those people really dodged a bullet.