Song: Girl, You’ll Be a Woman Soon by Urge Overkill
Alternate song: Honky Tonk Woman by The Rolling Stones (If you ever went to Sweet Alice in Chicago back in the day, I made sure you heard this song.)
Sometimes when I’m too lazy (or nauseous — Soren and I are sharing a tummy bug today) to write, I read my old blog to try to find non-embarrassing shit to post here and pass off as material you might want to read. This rarely is successful. So what the hell, I’ll post embarrassing shit from my old blog that I wrote when I was grossly underemployed and trying very, very hard to make myself sound more appealing than I was at the time so strangers on the internet would fall in love with me in that internet-fall-in-lovey kind of way that doesn’t amount to anything that might affect your real life. I’m willing to bet money that similar words have been written by 90% of people who went to Big 10 universities, wanted to grow up to be writers, used to be social smokers and good at pool, were known for playing Urge Overkill on the jukebox at their favorite bar in Chicago back in the day, tend to drink too much from time to time, and are fond of making rash decisions. Most of them probably had the sense to refrain from sharing it with the public.
These were written before I learned about the serial comma and hyphenating compound adjectives.
Content behind a cut, for your protection. Thank you, The Management
Also, here is a picture an old internet friend made for me back then. The fact that I took pictures of myself with a scarf on my head is indicative of my general mental state.